Sunday, July 26, 2009

Dad Sucks! We Want Pancakes...

I think I'm a pretty decent Dad. I'm not a total asshole. I kiss my kids and tell them that I love them. I hate to admit it but that's about as far as it goes on some days. I can be a lazy son of a bitch. I hate giving my kids baths. I'm usually so tired from working late during the week, that I walk around in a coma on the weekends. I'm a terrible communicator. Always have been. I keep all my stress bottled up deep inside of me. It used to give me diarrhea. Now it's moved to my back. I can be a pretty shitty husband from time to time as well. I snap at my wife when I'm preoccupied with business and I spend way too much time on this stupid blog. I've often thought to myself that I'm a much better Dad and Husband in my blog than in real life. That's a problem. My kids and my wife deserve much better than that.

This is why I try to do one thing a week consistently to give back to my family. It's the one thing that I'm really good at and it makes them all very happy.

I make Pancakes.

I know this sounds completely ludicrous and anti climactic but it's what I do. It might just be the most important thing in my life right now. It is quite possibly the glue that holds this family together.

"Times are tough, have a pancake."
"Camp sucked this week? Let me put some blueberries in those pancakes."
"What? Your friend told you that you're a jerk and you scraped your knee? How about some chocolate chip pancakes this weekend?"
"Hey kiddo. Everyone Shits their Pull-Ups every now and then. Have a short stack with some sprinkles on top."

Pancakes fix everything, if only for a moment and around our house, every moment counts.

Sometimes I suck as a Dad and a Husband but I am the best fucking Pancake maker in the universe and that is no joke. Ask my wife and kids. Every Sunday, I get to wipe the slate clean and give this Dad and Husband thing another go round. Try it sometime. Your family will thank you with sticky smiles...

If you don't already have your own recipe, today is your lucky day. I feel like paying it forward.

Out-Numbered Pancakes

  • 1 1/2 cups all-purpose flour
  • 1 1/2 teaspoons baking powder
  • 2 cap fulls of Vanilla Extract
  • 3 tablespoons of white sugar
  • 1 tablespoon of cinnamon
  • 1 1/4 cups whole milk
  • 1 egg
  • 3 tablespoons butter, melted
  • 1 table spoon of Baby Benedryl (Optional for really annoying kids)
  1. In a large bowl, add together the flour, baking powder, cinnamon and sugar. Then pour in the milk, egg, vanilla extract and melted butter; mix until silky smooth.
  2. Spray pan with cooking spray and heat over medium high heat. Pour the batter onto the frying pan, using approximately 1/4 cup for each pancake. Cook until you see the pancake start to bubble and then flip. Brown to liking on both sides and serve em' while they're hot.
  3. Cooks approximately 12 kick ass pancakes.
  4. Collect your smiles in bunches.
  5. Take a bow and thank your lucky stars that your wife and kids still love your sorry ass.

Thank goodness for the Pancakes. Otherwise they would be Out-Numbered...